Even after 278 days into this latest mission, the longest I have ever been on to seriously drop allot of weight; even now I still feel I am still struggling to stay focused on doing what I ought to do day in and day out. Even when I try hard and use my happy-focused face (see picture), it isn't always easy.
It is the mind-game of it all that really is the struggle though. By now I would hope this would be so 2nd-nature and that my mind would have stopped entertaining desires for vats of ice cream wrapped in bacon smothered in cheese sauce with a side of buffalo wings. But my mind still does taunt me so. Perhaps it always will.
I suppose there is an alternative; I could just give in. Oh how easy that would be. My mind would be at ease. Or would it? Wouldn't it just begin to taunt me in reverse, heaping scoops and ladles full of guilt upon me for diving into that which will keep me obese until my unfortunate death at a young age? Oh I know my mind would do just a thing.
So, I guess it is a choice of which mind-game I want to play. The game of being teased & taunted to eat what I know I shouldn't. Or the game of being self-pity & guilty for eating what I know I shouldn't.
I am choosing to accept the fact that I will be teased & taunted, perhaps forever, while hoping with all my super-hero powers that they will abate over time. And if not, I know I am strong enough to survive their assault upon my mind. I have to be - it is that simple; I have to be stronger than my temptations.
Which choice have, or will, you make?
Responsibility 199 - Gotta Do It!!
Posts
Who is doing the teasing and taunting, Patrick. is it Satan himself? Let's catch him, hold him down, and beat him senseless. That might hold off the teasing for a while.
ReplyDeleteThere is no "shouldn't eat this." You can't cheat on food. It's impossible.
ReplyDeleteOMG I don't have enough hands to raise for this one! Even when I thought I had it all figured out and would NEVER regain again, I regained again:( Story of my life. But I'm at work on a rewrite.
ReplyDelete"I have to be stronger than my temptations" - That is so true, Patrick, and I'm right there with you. I'm raising my hand with the other yo-yo dieters too. Been there done that - most of my life. We'll get there! *Hugs*
ReplyDeleteWow! Great post! Here's the part that tbugs me: Have you heard that "21 days to make a habit" theory? I call BS on that! I think maybe it should be as long as it took you to make the habit to break the habit. So if it took you 15 years to get to the heaviest weight, expect it to take 15 years before it becomes second nature. Pessimistic? Maybe.
ReplyDeleteI'm trying to follow an 80/20 rule now. If 80 percent of the time I'm awesome all the time, I'm awesome. The other 20 percent . . . well it used to be 100 percent and I sucked at life. I like where I'm at, and occasionally I mix in a real serving of alfredo.
ReplyDeleteWeight loss really is just a mind game. It is where the changes must take place.
ReplyDeleteSomething I've come to realize is that I am NEVER going to be a naturally thin person. I am NEVER going to be a person that doesn't have to think about what they're eating. It's NEVER going to be completely second nature.
ReplyDeleteI am always going to have to work at it, and sometimes I find that mindset exhausting. Having said that, I also recognize that it will be worth it.
*raises hand* Yo-yo!
ReplyDeleteWeight loss isn't terminal cancer. You can beat it. And you will. You just have to push for it more than you've ever pushed for anything else in your life and stay in it, too. It's like recovering from a drug addiction. You've just gotta give it 200 percent.
I know you can. I know you will. I bet you even do better than you thought you ever could. Look at BitchCakes! She never thought her legs would look as good as they could. She loves 'em now: all because she rocked it like her life depended on it...and...really?...it did.
Patrick. This is where I am at but I think for you it has been a much longer journey. I fell off the wagon and picked up 22 pounds from my goal weight of 190 – you DON’T want to do that. I have cut off the bleeding but convincing myself to stay on track and stay focused is extremely difficult. I think everyone finds their own motivation but at the core of it is doing it for yourself. Feeling strong and healthy is a great motivational tool. Stay strong and know that there are a ton of bloggers that are on your side and will support you through it!!!
ReplyDeleteMight be a good idea to skip the wings, but I'm the vats of ice cream wrapped in bacon smothered in cheese sauce is fine! Cheers, Rick
ReplyDeleteOH that's GOOD! Thanks for this. I am doing good on choices in reality today, but in my mind I'm going a little nuts. This is the perfect encouragement!
ReplyDeleteI go through the same thing day in and day out. But I refuse to go back to the way I was because I was unhappy when I was there, weighing over 300lbs. I guess the real question is, "Do you want to be around longer in life?" Because I know I want to live and be happy with myself for as long as I possibly can.
ReplyDeleteYou can do it my friend, one step at a time! We are all here for each other, during the rough and the not so rough times.
- The Heavy Man
My goal is to have a downward trend. I may have a day or two I make bad decisions but if I follow that with 10 days of great I'm ok. Like the yoyo can do down 5inches then up 1, then down 5, up 1.
ReplyDeleteI was just complaining to Allan about this the other day. Everything still screams my name. I am still as hungry now as I was in the beginning. I was wishing this would of gotten easier and more every day normal but not yet. Maybe I'm a super slow learner, I don't know but I too will raise both my hands for this one.
ReplyDeleteTake care Rick and do keep up the great work. Take care and God Bless!!
I want to have to have super-hero powers! But even Elastagirl got a big butt.
ReplyDeleteI want to be stronger, too, Rick. I have been on a diet most of my life. I never have more thatn 10 -30 pounds to lose...but I just can't get there. I did once....in my early 30's but food was still an issue for me then, too.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your comment on Skinny Me today. Glad to have found you. I am putting you on my Blogroll.
Leslie
Bacon is pure meat candy!!
ReplyDeleteI've already made peace with the fact that this will probably be a lifelong battle for me- but I'm worth it, and so are you- even if we have to fight daily for our health!
Great post Patrick! It is a mind game & your willpower or as MizFit puts, willingness to put the hard work in...
ReplyDeleteI will be honest - I have been at this so so so many years & really, it is always a mind game for me. There is not a day I wake up & want something not on my plan for the day BUT I have the willingness to do what is right for me AND plan for the times I just want to treat myself. It is a life long process & there will be bumps in the road & curve balls all the way BUT it can be done & I think you have your head on right Patrick - I really do!
I love happy focused face Patrick!
ReplyDeleteI love, love, love that!! It is so true. I'm going to remember that for my next mind battle.
ReplyDeleteLori
fab post dude. so true. you just ooze wisdom some days!
ReplyDeleteThe damn Mexican food calls me everyday...I want to be able to enjoy it reasonably one day, but I don't want it to define and suffocate me now...so I decline.
ReplyDeletePolar's Mom
www.polarspage.blogspot.com
I can't even claim to be a yo-yo dieter. I've just had a slow rise with a few lows. Nevertheless, I have never not thought about dieting and about what I should or should not be eating. I think that counts.
ReplyDeleteFor what it's worth, I believe you can do it and I don't think you could ever give in and give up.
That's my choice too!
I am accepting that fact too, Patrick - teased and taunted...probably forever. Look at how many people gain their weight back. That tells me something. I will always have to watch it and that's okay.
ReplyDelete